


Worth every dollar

by Nival_Vixen



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Bachelor Auction, Charity Auctions, Companionable Snark, Complete, Derek Hale & Stiles Stilinski Being Idiots, Derek Hale is Bad at Feelings, Emotionally Repressed, F/M, Inspired By Tumblr, M/M, Police Officer Stiles Stilinski, Snarky Derek, Snarky Stiles, Werewolf Derek Hale
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-08
Updated: 2016-05-08
Packaged: 2018-06-07 03:40:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6783682
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nival_Vixen/pseuds/Nival_Vixen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles is up for auction at the Beacon Hills Police Department's charity ball.</p><p>Derek attends purely for the entertainment value.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Worth every dollar

Stiles is a little nervous. He reminds himself about four times in the space of ten seconds that this is for charity, it’s to help Beacon Hills Police Department. They really need new kevlar vests after the kelpie incident, and the K9 unit’s sorely lacking new members, so obviously, he’s not gonna let them down. But still, he’s nervous.

“C’mon, man, smile, breathe, lighten up. You’ll probably get a hot date out of it,” Scott says, grinning.

“You know I’m going to be stuck with old Mrs. Gawler. She’s going to take me out to that Italian place, get spinach in her teeth, and, oh god, Scott; what if she wants to kiss me? I don’t know if I can handle that kind of responsibility,” Stiles replies, half-serious (he’s seen Mrs. Gawler eat at that place, it was traumatising) and half- ... well, traumatised.

“Dude, seriously. You’ll be fine,” Scott says, shaking his head and clapping him on the back.

“That’s easy for you to say. Allison’s out there and she’s probably going to bid a ridiculous amount on you ‘cause she’s your fiancé, and I’m going to have the smallest bid here! Mrs. Gawler’s probably been saving up for this since last year’s calendar.”

Scott doesn’t have a reply to that; everyone in Beacon damn County knows about Mrs. Gawler’s old-lady crush on Stiles, especially after The Calendar.

Stiles’ name is called, but his feet are made out of lead. It’s obviously a curse, there’s fairies or some shit right there in town hall, so they need to get out. He’s about to say all of this to Scott when his best friend shoves him out onto the stage. _Former_ best friend, that is.

There’s a bit of a giggle from the younger women at the front, some tittering from Mrs. Gawler’s table (he can’t look, he honestly can’t), and he can see his father smiling (Melissa bought his date for $150, but she was almost outbid by Mrs. Martin; Stiles is sure there were threats and/or blackmail involved). Jordan Parrish is sitting at their table too, Lydia sitting next to him with an arm through his and looking both smug and possessive ($250).

Allison’s at another table with Kira, Erica, Boyd, and - Derek?

Stiles almost does a double-take on seeing Derek there. He had shown absolutely no interest in this when he’d initially found out about the BHPD auction; then, when Erica had told him Stiles was going to be up for auction, Derek had smirked and said he’d go just for the entertainment. _Bastard_.

“Stiles Stilinski is a rookie to BHPD, but as all of you know, he’s no stranger to the police. He caused as much trouble as he solved it, but I’m sure his trouble-maker ways are all behind him now,” Coach Finstock said with a brief glare.

Stiles thinks that whoever decided to let Coach host the event is obviously insane. He’s tempted to glare over at his ex-Coach, but the nerves are back now that he’s in front of all of these people. ( _Oh god, Mrs. Gawler’s got her purse out, sitting right there in front of her on the table_.)

“We’ll start the bidding off at $30,” Coach Finstock says, looking out to the crowd expectantly.

Mrs. Gawler’s bidding card goes up immediately and Stiles feels nauseous in the same instant. _Maybe those witches had come back?_ A really bad stomach virus had incapacitated half of the town for a week after they’d come to the farmer’s market two years ago. Stiles still can’t go near a bowl of potpourri without feeling sick. He subtly tries to mouth ‘witches?’ towards his friends, but they just look at him funny.

 _Great, they were all going to be attacked by witches and probably get stomach viruses to boot, and_ -

“$40,” Heather calls, Michelle shaking her head beside her.

“$65,” Mrs. Gawler responds before Coach could even accept Heather’s bid.

“$80,” Erica calls, winking at him.

“$95,” Mrs. Gawler calls, almost desperately.

“$100,” Ginger calls, her and the girls from Jungle giving him a wave.

Stiles almost relaxes at her bid - he didn’t care if he was the smallest bidder (biddee, was that even a word?) if it was just a night out with Ging and the girls.

There was a moment of silence - Mrs. Gawler talking with a few others at her table for more money, while Allison, Erica, and Kira talked too.

“Come on, people. You can’t let Stilinski go out on a $100 bid. Even Greenberg got more than that,” Coach says, almost in disgust, and glares across the room at Greenberg.

 _Well, that’s just embarrassing_. Stiles is two seconds away from screaming “werewolf!” and running to escape this complete disaster of a day.

“$115,” Allison calls.

“That’s more like it. Any other bidders?” Coach asks, and it’s like the floodgate opens.

Stiles can’t even keep up with who’s saying what, but Mrs. Gawler’s obviously got a few people invested, the women at the front must have decided he was cute enough, and Heather looks like she’s just trying to get more money out of everyone else since she and her girlfriend are laughing at each bid she calls.

$130 - $150 - $180 - $200 - $230 - $250 - $300, _Mrs. Gawler_.

Stiles’ eyes almost fall out of his head; not even Parrish sold for that much! He’s still boggling over it, still trying to wrap his head around the fact that he’s going to be stuck with Mrs. Gawler for a whole 4 hours over dinner, when there’s a loud scraping sound, a chair being scuffed along the ground as a new bidder stands.

“$1,000, final bid.”

_Derek?_

-

When Erica had mentioned that Stiles would be in the BHPD date auction, Derek thought it would be funny to see Stiles up on stage and have people bidding to go out on a date with him. _Skinny, defenseless, hyperactive Stiles?_ It would be a laugh, nothing more than a few hours of entertainment in an otherwise boring weekend. Apparently, it’s the complete opposite of that, and instead, Derek is in his own personal hell.

His friendship (if it can even be called that) with Stiles goes back years, not that either of them would agree on a specific time or date (Stiles would say that first meeting at the Preserve; Derek would say after the kanima incident at the pool - neither of them are wrong). They’re not dating, despite Stiles’ obvious interest and Derek’s own repressed feelings, they snark and bitch and get in each other’s faces all the time. He and Stiles are sarcastic and sassy, and refuse to let the other drown in their emotions and memories - Derek’s family, the nogitsune, anything and everything since then - but that’s not to say they’re compatible in any other way. They’re just friends.

Derek knows this, he makes sure he stays away when Stiles gets drunk and overly touchy with people; though, he doesn’t stay so far away that he can’t pull Stiles away when he’s trying to touch _complete strangers_. He avoids staring at Stiles for overly long, avoids catching Stiles’ eye when he’s the one staring, pretends he doesn’t smell arousal and lust and other things he daren’t name in the room. He’s been very good at denying himself everything that he wants for nothing. ( _Lie, lie, lie_ , his traitorous heart beats.)

They save each other’s lives over and over, and Stiles is the first one Derek thinks of when something’s happened or happening or about to happen. Not because he’s weak and defenseless, but because Derek trusts Stiles, he knows that no matter what, Stiles will have his back and protect him. Because they’re pack.

All of these small realisations seem to build up as Stiles is standing there and strangers (and friends) are bidding on Stiles, and Derek’s wolf is howling at the noise, at the indignation, at these people daring to challenge them, daring to even _try_  to take what’s theirs, what’s always been theirs. (Derek’s wolf thinks Derek is an idiot; if Stiles is willing and wanting, and _he_  is willing and wanting too, then there is no reason not to take what is offered.)

Mrs. Gawler’s voice calls out $300, and no. Neither Derek nor his wolf will stand for that. Not for his friend - his pack - his something/everything else. He stands up abruptly, fiercer than he intended, with the chair scraping on the floor and probably marking it, but Derek can’t bring himself to care. Erica’s looking at him like she knew he’d cave eventually; Kira and Allison and Boyd are simply watching, waiting.

“$1,000, final bid,” he says, and though his ears go pink, his voice is calm and steady.

 _Finally_ , his wolf thinks, rolling its eyes in a far too human manner.

-

“With Stilinski? Are you sure?” Coach asks, eyes wide and eyebrows almost in his hair.

Stiles can’t really blame him, he wants to ask Derek the same damn thing. He hears Derek’s growl from across the room and wonders if this is some sort of pack thing.

“Positive,” Derek replies.

“Uh, okay. Final bid of $1,000. Going once, going twice...” Finstock lingers here for a solid minute, as if waiting for a moment of insanity to pass. When Derek stays standing and doesn’t revoke his bid, he shrugs. “Sold, to the guy with angry eyebrows!”

If Stiles wasn’t still in shock, he’d laugh. Coach practically has to push him off the stage to get him to go greet his ‘date’, and Stiles stumbles a bit on the stairs, his legs turned to jelly now that the adrenaline’s fading.

He’s fought goddamn trolls and river kelpies before, but _this_ will be his undoing.

“Got you,” Derek murmurs, taking Stiles’ arm to help him straighten up.

Stiles gapes for a little longer (he’s sure Derek didn’t move as fast as _humanly_  possible to get to him), and tries to figure out how to form words. “$1,000,” he says, a bit squeaky and breathless all at once.

Derek’s definitely blushing now, but he shrugs in response.

Stiles slowly gains his composure as they make their way back to the table (money exchanges hands between Erica and Kira, Erica looking smug).

“Let me know how much you get Scott for, Ally. I need some air,” Stiles says, cheeks red.

He tugs at Derek’s arm so he’ll continue walking with him. It doesn’t take much convincing - Derek’s probably hating it in there with the overwhelming scents and chemo signals anyway - and they walk out of the town hall and down the street. Stiles is sort of ridiculously pleased that Derek doesn’t pull his arm away as soon as they’re clear of the hall.

“Thanks for saving my bacon back there. I was really freaking out that I’d have to go on a date with Mrs. Gawler,” Stiles says with a shudder.

“It wasn’t to save you, Stiles,” Derek replies, rolling his eyes.

“What?”

“It was an auction for a date,” Derek says, slowly as if to a small child with limited understanding.

It’s their usual way of ribbing each other, but it still takes Stiles a few seconds longer than it should to realise what Derek actually means.

“You mean... You actually wanted to go on a date with me?” Stiles asks, eyebrows raised.

“Do I need to explain the auction to you again?”

“Asshole!”

“What?” Derek asks, looking shocked as Stiles rips his arm out of his grasp, stopping on the sidewalk.

“If you wanted a date, you should’ve just asked! This is... this is way overboard and $1,000 is really damn stupid when you could’ve gotten one for free!”

Now it takes Derek a moment to work out what Stiles is saying.

“Are you upset that I bid on you?” Derek asks, sounding curious.

“No.”

“About the amount that I bid on you?”

“Kinda, but not really? It’s for charity - well, the police department - but it’s sort of a dick thing to say yes to.”

“All right,” he replies, nodding once in understanding.

An uncomfortable silence falls as they start walking again; _it’s the first awkward silence he and Derek have had since he was a teenager_ , Stiles realises.

“Are you upset that I didn’t ask you sooner?” Derek asks, breaking the silence.

“This isn’t _Twenty Questions_ , Derek.”

“Just answer the question.”

“Ugh. Yes. You asshole,” Stiles adds for good measure.

Derek just grins at him, that sort of sarcastic I can’t believe you/I can’t believe I like you grin that he doesn’t give to just _anyone_ , and then pulls Stiles in for a hug. Stiles lets him comfort him, the tactile thing is just really good, okay?, and they both pull away reluctantly.

Derek cups his cheek, his thumb stroking his skin gently, and moves slowly to kiss him. Stiles is too impatient to wait that long and smashes their mouths together instead. Derek just grins into the kiss. Stiles licks and bites and sucks, and Derek gives back as much as he gets. Stiles’ hands fist in Derek’s hair, tugging firmly, and Derek is suddenly grateful for the pack’s random tickle fights so he knows exactly where Stiles is sensitive.

“Worth every dollar,” Derek breathes when they finally pull away for air.

Stiles rolls his eyes; _he has no idea why he likes this idiot_. “Yeah, well, I don’t put out on the first date, you’ll need at least four dates before any hanky panky. That’s gonna cost you some serious dough, sourwolf.”

Derek snorts. “You said I could get dates for free.”

“I said **one** _date_ , asshole. I expect roses and champagne,” he says, grinning.

“I just spent a grand for charity, Stiles. I can buy you a peanut butter cup and some curly fries,” Derek replies.

Stiles thinks about it for five full seconds. “Sold, to the guy with angry eyebrows!”

“Idiot.”

...

The end.

**Author's Note:**

> (Allison buys a date with Scott for $135 - Heather almost won at $130 until everyone at Allison's table found their spare change. Her extra $5 was paid in pennies, nickles, and quarters)
> 
> This fic is also [on Tumblr](http://nivalvixen.tumblr.com/post/144039073312/captain-snark-its-a-sort-of-terrible-concept)


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